Six Things I Wish I Could Tell My Younger Self

Hindsight is 20/20, as they say. Looking back at my life, I wonder how it may have been different if I knew then what I know now. Here are 6 things I wish I could tell my younger self if I had the chance to prepare her for what was to come.

1. Life doesn’t happen on your timeline  

You may think you have your life all figured out, but you don’t and that’s okay. You’re not going to marry your high school sweetheart, have babies before you’re 30, and live happily ever after. There’s more you need to learn about yourself and about life before you do all of those things. You’ll be thankful for this someday.

You’ll learn that life doesn’t always go as planned—and that’s the beauty of it. There will be twists and turns along the way that will lead you down the path that God has designed just for you. It won’t happen when you want it to; it will happen in God’s perfect time. Just be patient. Actually, this may be worth telling you twice…be patient.   

2. Enjoy your journey 

Stop trying to rush through each stage of your life. Being so focused on the destination (your end game) will only keep you from being happy in the present moment. You’ll never feel satisfied. Take the time to stop and smell the roses and realize your life is pretty darn amazing just as it is right now.

Let this quote sink in:  

“First I was dying to finish high school and start college. And then I was dying to finish college and start working. And then I was dying to marry and have children. And then I was dying for my children to grow old enough for school so I could return to work. And then I was dying to retire. And now I a dying and suddenly I realized I forgot to live.”  

3. Don’t let your self-esteem be at the mercy of others 

Realize that the people who put others down only do it because they have low self-esteem and want to make others feel as small as they do.  

You’ll date a guy in your mid-20s who will constantly downplay your accomplishments by saying you only achieved them because of your looks. This same guy will say things like, “Just shut up and look pretty.” Please know he will treat you this way because he feels more powerful by making you feel inferior. He’s just a scared little boy in a man’s body who doesn’t like himself very much. Don’t feel like you need to prove yourself to him or anyone else. Know your worth and realize your value doesn’t lessen because of someone else’s inability to see it. You have so much more than your outward appearance to offer the right person. You may wonder why I’m not warning you to run for the hills before getting involved with this guy. Well, choosing to walk away from him is the driving force that makes you realize just how strong and independent you can be.

4. Trust your gut 

Never ignore your intuition. Listen to that inner voice, because the majority of the time it’s right. Love (or at least what you think is love) can make you blind. Open your eyes to the red flags and see the situation for what it truly is, not what you want it to be. Don’t let fear of any kind keep you trapped in situations you don’t feel right about. It will only hurt you more in the end.  

5. Everything happens for a reason  

Don’t get down on yourself about things that didn’t work out or opportunities that you’ve missed. Remember, nothing that’s meant to be yours will pass you by. Something better is in store for you.

6. Don’t try to force anything 

If things are meant to be, they will be. If they’re not, no amount of coercion will change that. Just let things evolve naturally without any expectations. Whichever way it plays out is for the best.

I realize I still have so much to learn, even at this stage of my life. That’s what life is about; if you’re not learning you’re not truly living. I don’t necessarily think I’d change anything that has happened through the years because the toughest lessons are what made me the woman I am today.

What would you tell your younger self if you had the chance?